Monday, September 3, 2012

Another New Year

It's been a while (about 3 months, yikes!) since I have visited this little space of mine.

But for good reason.

I have tried to avoid delving too deep into what is going on in my personal life (partly because it's really not that interesting), and I haven't really mentioned what my future holds since my very first post, but I have a lot of recent activities, projects, and memories that I want to share on here, but I kind of feel that I can't without mentioning some recent developments.

1. I started a new job.

Even more importantly, I started a new job that is in my actual chosen field. It incorporates both medicine and writing, which I love. My previous job was one I had worked at since the summer before I started college so it was and still is a very big adjustment, but one that I am thrilled about.

Part of that big adjustment is having a commute that increased by about an hour each way every day. Thus, I have lost quite a bit more time (and gas money) each day (go figure) but it's a sacrifice that I am willing to make.

All of these adjustments were made slightly more stressful by the fact that on my third day of my new job, I came home to discover that:

2. I got accepted to med school.

This was the very last thing that I was expecting to happen.

Like I said, I haven't really mentioned my quest to go to med school since my very first blog post, mainly because I had another year with lots of stress, waiting, frustration, and confusion with nothing to show for it in the end but two spots on waiting lists.

And I was very much ashamed, embarrassed, and disappointed in myself. I realize that is nothing to be ashamed about, but as I have said before, I hold myself to sometimes impossible expectations...something that I'm working on.

But, I accepted the situation, came to peace with it, and was confident that I did absolutely everything that I could, short of spending a great deal of money that I was not comfortable spending. I was beginning to explore other options, and had even started to fill out an application for the Peace Corps, something that I was excited (well, more petrified than excited, but those usually are the best kind of experiences) about pursuing.

And then I got the letter from PCOM that they wanted to offer me a spot for the DO Class of 2016. That was starting in six weeks. And required a large deposit and an answer in one week.

Only three days after starting a new full-time job that I signed onto for two years.

No pressure.

To be honest, I had a feeling that was going to happen once I accepted the job offer, because life likes to throw you lots of curveballs.

Once I was able to wrap my brain around the fact that after three years of beating myself over the head with MCATs, applications, clinical experience, GPAs, interviews, etc. and convincing myself that med school was NOT the right path for me, I actually got accepted to medical school, I panicked.

My mind was a blur of figuring out what I really DO want to do with my life, feeling guilty for having to many good things at once, and feeling the pressure of a time crunch. With my mind that scattered, I did the only thing that I know helps me set things straight: I made lists.

Pro and Con Lists to be exact. 

Writing everything out helped lead me to the decision to defer my acceptance for one year.

I was very fortunate that everyone, the admissions department at PCOM, my new supervisors, and of course (but no surprise) my family, were all very supportive in my choice and agreed it was the best option.

So, I now have a full year in which I can gain more experience in my field, pay off my undergrad loans before going into an OBSCENE amount of debt, and have a little more spare time to enjoy life before throwing everything into learning how to practice medicine. 

It will be interesting. 

So, I'm launching another year in which I wish there more hours in the day to explore, learn, and create...before I launch a new year in which I will wish there more hours in the day to study. 

I hope after my long break, there are still a few of you out there who will continue to join me in my search for more time. 

Feel free to let me know how you may have spent your precious time these past summer months!

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